It’s a Passage

It’s a Passage

File:Niklaus Manuel Deutsch 008.jpg



Well, they finally did it. The malicious cyberspace hackers who have been trying for 3 years finally brought their infectious hatchets down on my website last night. It’s like they took a knife to a painting I’ve been working on for years and thought nothing of slicing away at it.

Big deal. It happens to everybody– just build another site, right?


I suppose…but, there was an emotional investment in that original design because the inception of this site was linked to so much more. My son designed it for me …before the Orchid Resurrection had occurred in our relationship, before I thought anyone would care to read what I wrote. This site has been about so much more than posting a piece now and then. I’ve shared about people, places, passions and pain that I never would have imagined I’d write about three years ago, no less put out on the internet.


But the Lord convinced me then, that it was important to tell the stories; to write them with the same love for the paper and pen I had as child sitting at that The Precious White Desk.


I almost quit last night…spent some time crying tears of total frustration, wishing the Sharma Restaurant (which posed as an impostor for my site for a while) would just show up again and put me out of my misery.


Then I heard her voice on the phone this morning. She’s been struggling with a physical condition that’s hounded her for over 20 years, but despite her needs, she never misses a moment to dry my tears.


Mom, in case you go on my site today, it’s all different..It doesn’t look like me.

The ole Bell of the Wanderer… went the way of the cyberspace graveyard last night.


And she listened..really listened, because as my mom, she’s lived the life and blood reality of every word I’ve written. She knew the little girl who sat at that precious white desk and she knows the woman who cries over losing the first site her son built for her. Three years ago my son took over where my father left off, replacing the pen and the desk with a keyboard and a laptop…encouraging me last night not to throw in the towel.


It’s a passage..


My mom said the word that finally stopped the tears. Words have such power, don’t they? In the art of writing and speaking, they are the brushstroke that can either paint just the right color, or totally destroy the intent of the message.

A passage…I can understand that. Maybe God is doing something new for which I will need a few different brush strokes and colors.

So, forgive the construction zone for a while…

I’m letting go, listening and painting a new picture.



Remember not the former things,

nor consider the things of old.

Behold, I am doing a new thing;

now it springs forth,

do you not perceive it.

Isaiah  18: 18-19a




  • Niklaus Manuel

    die Madonna malend, Altarflügel




  1. Ben
    Jun 26, 2013

    I like the new website design :)

    • Caroline
      Jun 27, 2013

      Welcome, Ben….You are the master! You’ll never know how much it all means to me.
      Love and blessings+

  2. Marcia
    Jun 26, 2013

    To borrow from an old adage, you can’t put a good blog down. God bless you and your mom and your son and all that is yours.

    • Caroline
      Jun 27, 2013

      Marcia, What a lift you gave to my spirit to today! Thank you.
      Blessings always and +

  3. Patricia
    Jun 27, 2013

    Caroline, I am so sorry. I know I would be devastated as well. I can only think that your blog must be doing great good, since it has been under so much attack. You always put the Word of God out there in such a meaningful way. I’m sure there are many who are not pleased with that.

    I am praying for you. I know you will get your chin up and keep going. I always imagine you as a combination of endearing gentleness and a will of iron. I know you won’t let this defeat you. You just need to nestle in Our Lord’s arms for a bit.

    Maybe it will help if you see this as giving Jesus the gift of detachment from what you so loved about your blog. It’s easy for me to say this, because I’m not in your place. But, it still seems to me that He would be very pleased with such a heart gift.

    You know we will all be here to read your blog….even if it’s on the menu of the Sharma restaurant! :)

    Hugs to you my dear friend….and much love and prayers.

    And thank God for moms….who always know how to dry our tears! xoxo

    • Caroline
      Jun 27, 2013

      Patricia, Thank you for saying you can identify with me..Sometimes I feel so silly tying my emotions to things that are passing away. I think it’s a good word you’re giving me about detachment and that the costly gifts we give Jesus from our heart will please Him. That’s what I’m going to do…albeit while I rewire my full blooded Italian self..LOL My mom is just the dearest thing to me..and my son…after all we’ve been through ..oh dear I’ve got the tears all started up again. : )

      The Sharma Restaurant…I still think we all ought to have dinner there one day.

      And then there’s you..and all the lovely ladies that stop by and share thoughts …Honestly, You bring joy to my day when I see your names in my inbox..
      It’s been almost three years since I had the privilege of “meeting you.”

      I pray for you too…
      Love and Blessings always +

  4. Victor S E Moubarak
    Jun 28, 2013

    This is a brilliant website. Crisp and clean and easy to read and load. Well done whoever designed it.

    Yes Caroline … there is a video of me and Aunt Gertrude dancing … unfortunately. Follow this link:

    God bless.

    • Caroline
      Jun 29, 2013

      Victor…Now you’ve got us really laughing..My goodness that is too funny! She is my new favorite lady this Aunt Gertrude!
      I’m so glad you like the design…I’ve had a lot of great feedback on it..and all the thanks goes to my firstborn..bless his heart.
      Blessings always and our best to Aunt Gertrude : ) +

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